It's so easy to see the negative, where our own misperceptions make us believe God fell short or that he somehow forgot us or left us stranded somewhere.
I can almost hear some Christians gasping at the statement I just made, as if they've never had moments of doubting God's faithfulness.
The truth is, if we're honest with ourselves, we all have moments where we doubt God is going to pull through, or that he can handle our situation, or sometimes, even whether or not he exists at all. I don't care who you are. There are always going to be moments that challenge us and force us to choose whether or not we trust God is going to show up before we shut down.
You probably had one today, didn't you?
My sister drives this late-90s red Dodge Neon, and she's had it forever. She's not having any troubles with it right now, praise God, but it's a miracle she isn't. I swear, that car is falling apart in so many ways, I can hardly believe it's still running.
The automatic door locks growl every time she unlocks the car--I don't think she can even use the unlock button anymore without the solenoids in each door screeching until she turns the car off. Frankly, I'm not even sure if that's the current state of the unlock button; for all I know, the problem could've gotten worse since I noticed it.
Heck, her car leaks oil, and according to a mechanic friend of ours, she's got lots of tiny leaks all over the place. Although she had an oil change recently (which incidentally caused another leak that our mechanic friend had to "bless"), I'm pretty sure at least once in the car's lifetime, it's gone a year of driving past when she'd actually needed an oil change. I'm not blaming my sister because she actually does try to do the upkeep on her car, more than almost any woman would normally, but I am commenting on the incredible fact the car is still running.
It's even more amazing when you realize the college she went to was about fifty-six miles away, she came home every weekend for work, and on multiple occasions, she would make the entire trip and realize upon arriving or returning she forgot her uniform in her dorm or her art project at home and then make the trip twice more in the course of a few hours. Moreover, she is prone to impromptu road trips to Northern Virginia, between four and six hours away; mostly, she would pick up a friend she knew in high school who has since moved away, come back home with the friend, and three days later make the trek again. I feel like this happens at least once a month, sometimes more frequently depending on work schedules.
With what little I understand about the inner workings of a car, I recognize her car probably shouldn't be driving as well as it seems to be.
That being said, if I were in her place, I could see myself grumbling about the noisy locks or the masking tape holding the ceiling fabric up, or even about the difficulty in removing the oil nut when it's time to change the oil. The car isn't the greatest on gas, although it's not the worst either, but still, it could be better considering how small the car is. It has had problems before, like when it needed tires so bad it failed inspection or the time it left her stranded on the side of the road at one in the morning. There's certainly a lot to be dissatisfied with, compared to any newer car on the road.
But the car is faithful. Somehow, it's always gotten her where she needed to go, and she's still driving it to this day. She's at work right now, and it's sitting in the parking lot waiting for her shift to end. Even if it doesn't make sense, the car is still reliable, meeting her needs, and going with her on her journey.
I see God's work in that. In fact, I see God's work in all sorts of mundane things. I cannot tell you how many times I see God has provided for, sustained, protected, comforted, guided, or blessed somebody--anybody--myself included--and they responded by complaining. It actually makes me angry to see it.
Recently, a very wise redhead I know spotted me complaining and feeling down when I had no reason to other than that I had lost sight of the big picture and felt God was putting me in a place where I worried about how much I had to trust him. She told me to look back at all the times God had been faithful, and it was exactly what I needed to hear and exactly what I needed to do.
I don't remember the context, but a day or two later, a girl from my small group repeated the message from God as she drove us to the bible study.
Though I walk in the midst of trouble, it is the Lord who preserves my life. The moment I start remembering the prayers he's answered, the promises he's fulfilled, the love he's bestowed on my life, I wonder why I ever got so low in the first place. With a God like ours, I can rest assured that the Lord will fulfill his purpose for me and he will not forsake the work of his hands.
Thinking back on what I wrote at the beginning of this post, perhaps the Christians that would have gasped at the doubt I was showing weren't gasping because I doubted, but maybe it's because they see the big man upstairs is nothing if not faithful.
I know that's what I did when I rediscovered how faithful God has been in my life.
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